my friend left her window open in her bedroom and came back to find this
look at his self-satisfied little face, the cheeky shit
if there was a post to describe australia, this is it
you mean to tell me this isn’t even a pet bird?
that in australia, you have wild birds that just fly from house to house with the express purpose of fucking shit up?
fucking HELL australia, what is wrong with you?
wake up australia
That’s what birds do
They fly around and fuck shit up
Do you have some kind of mysterious nice birds in your weird foreign country
Do birds in America and England fly into your house and make the bed and tidy up the living room a little bit
It’s cold here, so they just bounce off the windows and lie there and twitch spasmodically while you look for the shovel.
Basically hurling themselves at windows is the worst thing birds do
yeah man a kookaburra literally flew into a classroom at my high school and just sat his smug ass down on top of the desk for a good 20 minutes
why has nobody mentioned the fact that in australia there are 3-4 months a year where everybody just accepts that they’re going to get attacked by magpies. It is literally called “swooping season” and these birds will fly down to peck your fucking face, and people get their eyes ripped out and shit, it’s fucking brutal.
My teacher had to go to hospital and have surgery because of swooping season. It was in the parking lot of school and all the kids would do a mad dash towards the car as the magpies tried to kill us.
no but when you’re 12 years old and riding your bike like mad on the way home from school with an icecream bucket on your head with like branches and shit sticking out if it to scare them off and none of this is considered strange
what the actual fuck australia
Female empowerment fail that I went through tonight, to my own amusement.
I do this a lot because I’d rater not risk hurting my carpal tunnel. I may not need a “man” but I definitely need a partner lol.
most annoying tumblr trends 2013!!!
- "swiggity swag"
- "do he got a booty"
- "bitch i might be"
and now, sliding into place right on time:
- "surprise bitch"
I just got this text from my friend lauren.
“My friend lily works at dress for success there and they ran out of plus size women’s winter coats. She has to keep turning women and it’s -4 and there are no coats above a size 14. If you know of anyone who lives in Minneapolis who might have a plus sized coat to donate, please have them email email@example.com
Signal boost please!
Friendly reminder that Vanellope von Schweetz is a disabled, bullied, homeless 9-year-old girl with no family and no friends.
#she’s also a fucking princess #who is the strongest character in her entire game #and learned to use her disability to her advantage #not to mention when she turned princess she decided just to be herself #she literally let no code change who she was #and she’s still as every bit of a badass as calhoun was
Wreck-It Ralph was SO GOOD.
what if loki doesn’t wear clothes and he just like wishes his clothes onto his body but they’re illusions so he’s perpetually naked
what if loki just wears footie pajamas all the time but nobody can tell because his clothes are illusions
voting against gay marriage is like ordering a piece of cake at a restaurant and having a complete stranger be like “waiter, cancel that cake”
"waiter cancel that cake it’s ruining my cake and i don’t know how to explain it to my children"
"my dietbook said I can’t have cake so throw that guy’s cake away too."
The GOP has a plan to stop Wendy Davis: blatant voter suppression.
Women don’t like having their bodies policed, and are supporting Davis like no Democrat has been backed before. But Republicans aren’t fighting back on the issues — they’ve pushed through a Voter ID law that blocks the votes of countless Texas women.
Starting this November, Texans must show a photo ID with their up-to-date legal name instead of IDs like a birth certificate. That’s not a problem for single or married men — but it leaves a third of Texas women scrambling in a state with just 81 DMVs in its 254 counties.
The only way the GOP can keep Texas is by rigging the game. Women have the power to turn this state blue for the first time in two decades, but we need to help secure their rights first. Please, join us in calling on the Texas legislature to get rid of this unconstitutional Voter ID lawand stop trying to strip women of their votes.
DANGER! DANGER FOR TEXAS WOMEN!
Texas I think it’s time for you to secede
how the FUCK does this HAPPEN
Rich old white men
I actually cannot handle this bc it’s so damn funny and all these guys are incredibly disgusting human beings hahahaaahahaha
theyre so damn frustrated from being rejected that they post all this dumb shit on the Men’s Right’s Movement facebook page https://www.facebook.com/groups/mensrightsmovement/